At first I tried to find people the old fashioned way, which means getting out old address books, calling other friends, trying to find parents and checking phonebooks. No result there, but that’s life! People move, friends move, parents move, oh and let’s not forget I moved a couple of times too. So, I turned to the Internet. First I tried Google. On TV and in the movies that seems to work all the time. Bummer, that doesn’t work in real life! (Duh!!)
Okay, next step the Dutch equivalents of friends reunited and other sites. The problem with that; you have to register. At first I had no problem with that, but now I’m regretting ever registering. Why? Instead of finding my long lost friends, people found me! People I don’t remember, people who want to reunite, people I don’t want to reconnect with, people who had a crush on me when I was 10, people with memories I don’t have and people I have no special bond with. How weird is that!And here is the dilemma. Should I continue my search? Maybe the people I am looking for don’t want to be found by me? Maybe they don’t remember me? Maybe they feel the same way as I do about all the people that found me? Hmm… I have to think about this! Especially now I, by sheer luck, came across the email address of one of the persons I was looking for.
You can leave your suggestions at Lost and Found.
6 comments:
Maybe you did not supply me with suggestions zoom! but it was a great comment. You have confirmed the feelings I having. I’m still thinking about this one. There has to be a solution :)
that one person you're looking for? go for it. no fear no 'what if's'.
I'm with Boo on this, send the email.
Isn't it the old dilemma of all beginning (or re-establishing ) relationships? Every new connection bears the risk to be rejected.
You will never know, if the effort was worth, if you don't try it. If the person you are thinking about doesn't wants to be founded by you, then she has all right to say so, and it is enough politeness, to accept that. But to anticipate a no is limiting your possibilities.
As my actual favourite quote says:
"Beneath every no / lays a passion for yes that had never been broken." (cited by Tim O'Reilly from Wallace Stevens), but you have to do the first step, which may bring you to a "yes".
I think, there is no reason, to be shy about that, except the obvious, that it is not very nice beeing rejected...
Dakota, you'll never know unless you try.
If you're not in a strong enough place to accept that they wouldn't want to reunite, then I wouldn't move forward. If you are feeling strong, and good about yourself, then go for it!
Wow, thank you all! It was great to read all your views on the matter.
boo and Kat I’ll forget about the 'what if’s'.
Wanderingthinker, you are right. In Dutch we have a saying: Ja heb je, nee kan je krijgen, which translate to something like this: You have Yes, you can get No! If I don’t give it a try I will never know. And the person has every right to say ‘no, thanks’!
Paula, I think I’m in the right place….I could even handle the rejection :)
So, I’m going to do it. Yeah! First I have to confirm that I have the right email address but that shouldn’t be that difficult. After that I will send the email. And if this doesn’t result in something positive I at least know that I gave it my best shot :)
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