Mind, body and soul sessions (#6)

Focus on the good in your life!

We all, occasionally get them, negative thoughts and feelings. One day the glass is half full, the next it is half empty and on really bad days it might have spilled completely. Relationship problems, people, pressure at work, money worries, stress, a sense of desperation, hopelessness and boredom all affect our attitudes and feelings. It's easy to believe that we're completely at the mercy of our feelings, but in fact we're not…..hurrah :) To some degree the way you feel is dictated by your thinking pattern (or style).

People tend to make sense of the world in two thinking styles. Thinking styles are the way you look at life and explain situations in your life or the world. The first style is more optimistic, the second is the more pessimistic view. Bad feelings often are the result of bad, pessimistic and unhelpful thinking patterns. If you spend all the day, every day, thinking about problems and negative stuff, as some people do, you're unlikely to feel very happy. Optimistic thinking styles are linked with happiness, good health and success. Now you might think that if you are born with one predominant style (the pessimistic one for instance), you can never change but research suggests that you can!

This is obviously easier said than done because people can’t simply decide to think positively and change their lives overnight, it’s not that simple. There are, however, steps you can take if you want to be happier. You can make a start by looking for the good in your life. Everyone has things in their life for which they can be grateful. Spend more time thinking about these and I promise you you'll feel a lot better.

Count your blessings

Start a new ritual: reflect on at least five things you're grateful for, things you appreciate, things that make you happy or just things that made you smile. (hmm…that sounds kind of familiar ;)) Maybe you enjoyed the nap you stole after nights of barely any sleep at all. Or you relished that glass of beer in the heat. Or you're grateful that you and your friends spend some quality time together.
How and when you conduct this ritual is totally up to you. Some say you must write down your five things before you go to bed, so you can drift off feeling happy. Others suggest you take stock when you are in the shower, or when you have breakfast, so you can start the day feeling great. But like I said…. How, when and where is totally up to you.
You can make a new list every day or you can focus on the same five things every day. Again, this is up to you! There are no strict rules here. Oh hold on, there is one rule (bummer ;)). You need to make your list as detailed as possible.

The details are worth it. The details train you to pay more attention so you're less likely to miss the little things that create positive feelings. So remember the first gulp of beer, the taste, the way it made you feel and the smell. Or write about the laughter of your friends, remember the sound, remember their faces. You can find a lot of happiness in those small things. Happiness is in the nuances, relish them.

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And now it’s really time for this…..C U L@er!!