Encounter with the paracetamol pusher.

First of all, I know I've already mentioned it in the comment section yesterday, but for those of you who've missed it, thanks for all the well wishes everyone! I am not jumping around yet, but I do feel a lot better (and I hate staying in bed) so, here is a little update.

Yesterday I went to see my doctor and that’s always a lot of fun (or a waste of time, whatever you like to call it), because most of the time you already know what he's going to say and what he's going to give you……that magical drug called paracetamol and it almost always comes with this advice: 3 times a day, for 7 days, and if that doesn’t make things better, make another appointment. So, let’s say you have done that and there is no improvement, on the 8th day you call his assistant to make a new appointment, which is always a pain in itself. She will reluctantly grant you a new appointment for the following week and tells you to keep taking the paracetamol (miraculously they always give you enough for 2 weeks). It’s almost as if they are thinking 'Hey, if it didn’t kill you the first week, it’s not going to do so in the second.' BTW, I always believe that the whole paracetamol run is some sort of test to see if you are seriously sick. But that’s how it usually goes. Yesterday was a bit of a different story.

I was lucky to get an appointment so soon, but that was probably because I’d thrown in a bit of chest pain. Nervously I awaited my turn. Not really sure why though, because I already had a vague idea what I had….a virus and heartburn and I actually did want him to give me something for the latter because the over-the-counter stuff wasn't working. I already knew you had to see a doc for the really good (or should that be bad) stuff.
Last June I had a bad case of heartburn too, at the time I actually thought I was going to die and that thought brought on a panic attack and I ended up in the emergency doctor’s office. Not nice, but quite an experience. Last week I had a milder episode, but last Monday it was back in full swing, pain in the breastbone area included, and the worst part….it wasn’t going away. Add to this all flu-like symptoms and there you have it ladies and gentleman….. a fine mess!

But back to the doctor’s office. Of course he wanted to send me away with just the paracetamol but I told him I was going nowhere until he gave me something else for the acids too, because it was haunting me like a terrible nightmare (or the bad Chinese food I had last Sunday). And strangely enough, it was almost as if someone flicked a switch, I had his full attention all of a sudden. OMG….how scary!
He asked me to tell him the full story and so I did. When I finished, he looked at his computer, typed a few things and stared at the screen for a very long time. All I could think was ‘is he writing me a prescription or is he just googling my symptoms?’ Because come on…..you never know these days! But, he actually was printing out some nice (not!) instructions and a diet list because he thinks I have some form of GERD. Oh jolly!

So here are some of the things I am not allowed to have over the next two weeks: coffee, tea, (oh, no coffee and tea….how on earth am I going to survive that…the horror!)
milk, alcohol, orange juice, sodas. There’s only one thing I can drink safely and that is……water! I can’t have chocolate, ice cream, salad dressings, cheese, anything with tomato (so no soup, pasta sauce, or pizza for instance), mint (he even suggested a mint free toothpaste), onions, garlic, pepper, (hot)spices, cabbage and cauliflower, milk, vinegar, fat.
Actually the list goes on and on, but I am not going to bore you with that. If I want to be safe, it’s best to stick to water and bread. Oh and let's not forget, I am allowed to swallow my prescribed drugs. Hooray!
Nah, it's not all doom and gloom, there are still a few things I can eat and drink; I just have to figure out which ones. And it’s not a life sentence (at least not yet) it’s just two weeks (I have to see him again).

Wish me luck, because I think I am going to need it.